“You’ve changed everything!” * she said, looking up at me with puppy dog eyes and an amazed and laughingly annoyed to be so horribly into me smile. Yesterday.
A few months ago I’d noticed that J21** was starting to become more irritated, and kept making snarky little emasculating comments. The quality of sex was declining. Of course that would not do. Thas was completely my fault, so I changed everything.
I moved to my other place for a few days, stopped eating, and then after giving in to her pleas to be with me again kept a regimen of only eating every second day, and going to the gym each food day. It took four weeks of that regimen to get the beginnings of a six pack, and to cut a fine figure next to her in the mirror.
I kept up with learning my guitars, improved our living space, hung a heavy boxing bag on the tree, and bought a saxophone.
I told her what I was doing and exactly why. I told her that it was my job to constantly seduce her and keep her desparately devotedly crazy in love with me. And that it was her job to devotely suck my dick and come a lot. You can pull back the curtain; it makes no difference. As long as you know a woman’s attraction triggers, the point is to push them.
Yesterday she came upstairs and complained about being too in love. “It hurts!”, she said, holding her heart. “I’m going fucking crazy!” she said, pointing at her little head. “I’m only downstairs on the 2nd floor, and I can’t stop thinking about you or missing you.”
This is normal. This is MY normal. This is something I know how to do, and I do it on purpose. I like doing it. It’s more than a hobby, more than a specialty. More than even a personality. It’s like music to a musician; it’s impossible NOT to play music, and to learn more and more and get better and better.
If I were to record the simple little daily interactions that I have with J21, each sentence would be a masterclass in seduction. It’s really that good. We have a LOT of fun. Every day.
If Mozart were to talk to you about his music ability, you might want to take how he describes his relative experience as bragging. But how else can it sound? He had an innate talent that he cultivated from a young age, and devoted himself to it because he couldn’t help it. He was tail end of the curve great, so anything he would say about himself would compare himself favorably.
I have some innate language and writing talent that I noticed at age nine, and since then I’ve put in long time and attention to the art of writing. I find compliments about this encouraging to keep going, and here is an unsolicited compliment I recently discovered on another blog:
He is an expert at conducting MLTRs, plus a rigorous, deep and courageous thinker (and one hell of a writer)… High quality writing from a very original thinker.
I can safely take some pride in my writing, not only because of what qualities I’ve learned to build into it, but because I get social feedback for it. Self esteem is our interpretation of how others see us, and it’s not narcisism or bragging to have accurate self esteem. It would be false modesty, which is also a kind of arrogance, not to be able to accurately position your abilities relative to various crowds.
One thing that always strikes me as interesting is hearing musicians talk about their best works and performances. Their is no false modesty. Perhaps because musicians really must be close to the muse. People who are affected by the muse can never take credit for it. It doesn’t really belong to us. We don’t know where it comes from anymore than anyone else does. So we can’t have false pride; the muse is incredible and deserves any praise she gets. Musicians are always enthusiastically proud of their best work, and modesty or bragging simply doesn’t enter into the picture.
Learning is also heavily involved with the muse.
I was watching a video by a famous guitarist, who developed some guitar techniques, talk about his techniques and how he discovered them. There are two aspects about this that I noticed:
- He was playing.
In SEA you usually have to hire two or more workers to do the job of one person, because they don’t find work fun if working alone. So there will be two people behind the cash register. It seems insane, but there is some wisdom in it. We don’t like to do things that are not fun.
So if you want to learn something, don’t approach it as work. Instead you need to find ways to make it fun, for you. That will be personal.
- He was putting meditative attention into his learning. He was immersed in it, having constant flow moments, expanding his awareness into the moment, being as widely present and attentive as possible. This is another antidote to boredom. It increases the screen-refresh rate and compresses time and gets your awareness working at a higher clock speed, cramming more and more information into the present moment. When you do that, you don’t need lots of noise to keep you entertained, because your mind already has quite a lot of information to process.
Every guitarist has a different signature sound. Although you can learn from other guitarists, you can’t be another guitarist. You will be interested in different things, learn different tricks, and specialize.
This is the same for writers. Each writer has a unique voice. Sometimes writers will copy out word for word an entire book of a writer whom they respect, in order to help learn the style, however after time they discover their own voice.
It’s the same story for comedians. Sometimes a comic will be so influenced by a mentor he’ll seem a copycat. Eventually his interests and abilities move him into a style uniquely his own.
The same is true for game and seduction. You can’t copy any PUA. You just can’t. You will have different interests and skills and will respond positively to different feedbacks that interest you more.
As an example I could not and would not emulate Krausers or Blackdragons game strategies. That would be completely impossible for me. I can’t even read Krauser’s seduction guides, as for me the R selected bad boy game is completely disinteresting, and I’ve found so much success with my very different style that I find his entire philosophy of attraction to be fundamentally false, at the root. And I get unstoppably jealous, at times, and so would not be interested in sharing the women I fuck, as BD recommends.
So if you are going to learn things about female nature and seduction from me, you’ll have to keep in mind that you will be CREATING your reality, and the reality that women respond to. You will be creating your own unique voice on the guitar, your own unique voice as a comic, your own unique seduction style. You will be creating an entire world view, and an entire world.
Believe me, you don’t want to be a keyboard jockey. This blog might be entertaining, but if you are using it purely for entertainment, you are mis-using it. It’s information you can incorporate into your real lived personal life. It’s here for a purpose, and a purpose that as a reader I sincerely hope that you will learn to appreciate.
** J21 is my 21 year old live in girlfriend of 9 months. Her first name starts with J. I’m 52. You’ll see references here to M21 up to M29, N17 up to N22, S16 up to S21, V23 up to V26, and so on.
I’ll come back and write more. Please always remember that if you get my blog on a feed, that I always update the first draft, so your RSS feed will barely resemble the final post.
Also comment a lot.