Every existing human race and every territory is the result of conquest and brutal wars. Often genocides. My life has been full of incredibly deep to the point of traumatic heartbreak, and I’ve caused a great deal of pain. Animals survive off of eating the living flesh of other animals.

If I had not caused so much pain, I would never be attractive or capable enough to cause more pain, or feel more love.

If I were the kind of guy who would let a woman I live with slide, and as appreciation for her past efforts of putting out children just let her get fat and retire from regular blow jobs and fucking, I would not be the kind of man she’d be so into and passionate about in the first place. She’d never have fallen in love on the first date, nor become tamed, nor have asked me today to get marriage pictures to show her parents, as a 30 year younger hottie with a perfect bod.

For me, a relationship is not about points earned in the past. It is a day to day thing. I have no interest in living with a girl who I have no sexual interest in. I know perfectly well what it’s like to have side dishes, but I don’t see that as a substitute. For me, a relationship is not a relationship without physical lust and sex. I can get friendships on the side.

I’d see it as dishonorable and disgusting to live a life of quiet desperation. A fat wife with no sex drive would be like waking up to farts in my face and nagging. Visual flat out disrespect and dishonor.

I’m not a nice guy. Not at all. Many of my actions are near psychopathic. I have extremely high expectations, and strong boundaries. Every single day, I demand serious tribute in terms of love, devotion, joy, sex. Our house is full of kindness and love and sex. Every day.

That came at a terrible, horrible cost.

Bitter sweet.

*****************
You wouldn’t want to stay with a girl who put up with too much shit. You’d never be able to respect her. No girl wants to stay with a man who would put up with living with a fat unattractive wife who does not give regular blowjobs. That man has low standards and low ability.

So if you put up with it, it’s a self fulfilling prophesy. Sometimes you have to move on, and if you can’t, you deserve a fat nag.

Paradoxically, a girl will have a lot more pride in herself, for being with a man who has very high expectations for HER behavior. Give her too much slack, and she’ll feel worse not only about YOU, but about herself. She’ll subconsciously think “what kind of woman would put up with a man who puts up with my shit?” What you don’t put up with and what you demand from her is as good as she can be, so give her the option for some pride in her man and her life. Or move on. Love is never enough, by itself. You need some base core compatibilities. And if either of you is fat that means those compatibilities are not there. If you were way into her, you’d work damn hard to keep her way into you. If you aren’t working hard, you aren’t way into her.

I don’t buy it that relationships get stale and the passion fades. People get fat and lazy and stop doing their fucking job. It’s not the same thing. Do your job, and be with a girl who will do her job. My personal lived real life experience is that passion can be kept strong and alive, and many times a day sex and a very warm loving heart for the girl can be maintained year after year after year. I’ve done that before, and I’m doing it now. It’s normal. You should expect it, and demand nothing less for your life. And out of her.

Most people lately are obese. Only 1 in 10 marriages stay together because the couple is still in love.

That doesn’t mean that being fat is normal. That doesn’t mean that the 1 in 10 are the abnormal exception.

It’s NORMAL to remain in passionate love. It’s YOUR normal. Normal for YOU. Because that’s what you learned how to do, and YOU accept nothing else. YOU are fit, and work damn hard to maintain peak sexual yogic fitness, and to be as attractive as you possibly can be. For YOU it’s normal to endlessly learn how to be socially skillful, and relationship wizard level skillful. For YOU it’s an endless never ending life long journey, and it’s damned fucking important. More important than anything else.

There are no extenuating circumstances, no exceptions to the rule.  YOU create the extenuating circumstances, and YOU are the exception to the rule.  I’m telling you, men do this, men have always done this.  Exceptional men who decided to live exceptional lives, because for them nothing else could possibly be normal.

No one gets to retire from relationship duties. You don’t get to store up a bank account and live off of the returns. Every day you have to put in fresh work. Because every day is a fresh new day.

Some people stay together for the children. I don’t agree with that, although I do agree that children need both parents. But if the parents don’t get along, children will be imprinted very badly. Monkey see, monkey do. Don’t let them see a crappy relationship. They’ll think that shit is normal.  It will affect them either for the rest of their life, or if they are lucky, for only a great many poor and painful relationships.

***

Your girl should be in some ways out of your league.  Keeping her should inspire you to be the best possible man that you can be.  You’ll HAVE to be.  Or else.

The same goes for her.  If she isn’t working damn hard to keep you, then that’s sheer disrespect to the both of you, and you both deserve better.  Maybe she’ll work harder for a different guy.  Otherwise, not your problem.

***

Girls will somehow read your past history and your expectations nearly immediately.  Within the first 15 minutes of the first date, she might bring up the subject of babies, and within 30 minutes you might both realize that you are going to move in together.

The absurdity is, the bitter sweetness is, the dark humor is, that girls go for bad boys, and bad boys only.

I don’t mean what you think  I mean.

You have to have very high standards and expectations, and a history of having those standards and expectations met.  You need strong boundaries.  You can’t be “nice”.  You have to have cracked eggs, perhaps many eggs, because only “nice” guys never crack eggs.  Having boundaries and expectations sometimes means breaking hearts, and having your own heart broken.

That’s the absurdity of it.  You can’t get what you want until you can be very clear that it’s over if she get’s fat.  She’d never even be into you if she even sniffed for one moment that you’d put up with that kind of shit.