There is one way our minds can work that is emotional and at the same time symbolic. We can think of an idea or physical sensation or image and have it relate to emotions. Some people feel surrounded by God’s love. Some feel the love of Jesus in their hearts when they pray. As children we can feel the love of our Grandma in her whole house.
When you are in love you adore your object of desire, and she adores you, and you can just drink in each others faces in appreciation. And when you go out, you not only can see her face and figure when you close your eyes, but can feel the joy in your heart that she brings to you.
This is just gradeschool crush stuff. It’s one way the mind can work. I’m not saying it’s the best way or a way we should all aspire to, but it’s common enough that a lot of people have felt that way or could feel that way if they set up the appropriate circumstances.
When you allow your emotions to be written all over your face, because deep down you have an overabundance of joy that you don’t mind sharing, this is a form of confidence. It’s conditional confidence, because you are happy for a reason, and you know the reason. The advantage to conditional confidence is that it’s backed up by reality. You really are happy for real reasons.
So for some personality types that place a high value on truth and coherence of facts within their world view, manipulating the conditions of life to achieve strong happiness can work very well.
Some conditions that I’ve noticed increase my happiness:
* Having really open hearted powerful strong intense sex with hot girls who make me hard just by looking at them or hearing them talk.
* Having more than one such girl, and having them both know I’m not exclusive, and yet they are completely and unstoppably devoted.
* Being the master of my realm who can have others do any task I would want to have others do, and having them at hand full time. Cooking, cleaning, bringing me food, maintenance, business, paper and legal work, anything.
* Having a great household physical environment, and more than one.
* Having great friends who I really like.
* Learning piano by playing. This one is surprisingly enjoyable and interesting.
* A regular chi-kung practice.
* Sports interests including weights, boxing on bags and sparring, ping pong.
* Starting and growing interesting businesses.
A few years ago I was in a rough place. My mate had just died, my health was dangerously and painfully bad, and I had only my ex-girlfriend as social support. Since then there has been an emotional journey to where lately I’m often noticeably happy. So happy that it stands out in awareness – wow, I really feel GOOD!
And for my personality type, that journey was not a journey of internal re-arrangement of emotional furniture. It was about building a business, growing my financial and business and logistical support, hiring employees, and lately attracting interns to further grow more businesses and greatly increase social happiness. That made it much easier to arrange the logistics to get the 2nd girl – having my big place and easily offering her an apartment made everything so much easier. All these external things are greatly contributing to a huge increase in quality of life and brightening of mood.
I’m starting to realize that it should be possible to leverage this increase in mood into being more social; using the happiness as a way to be open and engaging, socially. Just be open and cheerful, and willing to say hello and enjoy the interaction.
That would be new for me.
So, one way that the mind can conceptualize this social tactic is to “carry around the love of your girls in your heart”. Or more likely I’ll conceptualize it as just being fucking happy and willing to know it and share it.
I want to phrase the idea in a sappy cheesy way to give the idea that we don’t have to throw out the baby with the bathwater when it comes to dating girls – there is a lot that is valuable in romance.