Blackburn said: A little while back in your post on “Romantic Libertine Game” you looked at a post by Zan Perion and talked about getting where he was coming from but not having conversations like him when approaching. I am curious what kind of conversations you have you have with these girls.
You have this whole moved-in-on-the-first-date thing going on. How do you pull that off? Most of that unspoken I am sure. Just the vibe you give etc… But you still need to talk a bit. So what are you saying? Also what kind of body language? What are you doing with your eyes etc? There is some powerful shit going on when they MIOFD. Your post on “And all this time she’s been missing me terribly” innumerates your examples on this. How does it go down?
This whole idea sits with me better than a lot of the PUA stuff. I really need to feel a connection with someone before the sex starts. I like what your saying about not wanting to loose the ability to bond.
Ya, move in on the first date. That is odd, isn’t it.
One thing I’ve been talking about a lot lately is the importance of having a full repertoir of emotion, and not stunting your display by pre-editing your emotions out of some concern to be aloof. As if any deviance from the script of being an anhedonic droid would somehow show a weakness. I’ve been mentioning that in order to be able to show strong interest, the man also requires strong boundaries. And recently I’ve mentioned that in order to move things to a deeper level the man has to trust the woman to see his darker sides of anger, and he must use that anger to dominate her.
Previously I touched on loving a girl as she is, by having fun with her inner slut. I like to nickname most of my girls Bitch. Or Daughter. Or best yet, Daddy’s Little Bitch. Instead of loving what I want them to be, I love even her dirty little secrets. That’s a doorway to instant intimacy. And it also displays to the girl that you really know women – that you must be that alpha guy they are all fucking – because you aren’t fooled. You aren’t even expecting her to play Ms. Nice girl. In fact you try to corrupt her.
A lot of guys have a madonna/whore thing going on. They reserve intimacy for the good girls who deserve it. But if that’s your attitude, girls will never feel like you really understand their dark secrets, and will therefore never fully feel loved and appreciated. I know it seems like a strange catch22 impossible contradiction, but it’s essential to love her inner whore. This is easily explored with sexual role play. She’ll bond to you fast when she knows that you love her inner slut.
About the eyes, this is a trick I’ve never seen discussed, and yet I don’t know how other guys seduce without it. You look at her with lusty appreciation, as if you are eating her up with your eyes. You have to genuinely be into her to do that, and when you are doing it right you’ll feel as if you are containing her in your gaze. You’ll get a hard on. This literally can make girls weak in the knees. It’s not something I do unless the moment calls for it. I still do that occasionally with my live in, and she still swoons. I look at her as if I want to eat her all up. It’s a mixture of adoration and pure animal lust. As if I’m cooking her with my hot gaze. I feel it in my whole body, and that’s the secret. It has nothing to do with getting your face in the right shape, it’s all about feeling deeply. That gets transmitted and the both of you will feel as if you are sharing space. Eye sex – you’ll feel a union happen. Feel. You start with you feelings – of adoration in the heart or of base lust in the belly or intellectual appreciation in the forehead or spiritual communion from above your head or whatever mixture it is that you have, and the feelings come out of your eyes and right into the girl, and you feel as if you merge. Very sexual. They eye trick is closely connected to loving her inner slut. You don’t just love her as a girlfriend. You love all of it.
You don’t need the kinesthetic synesthesia of feeling emotions in your chakras to do the eye trick, but you do need to embody your strong feelings with depth and nuance.
But I don’t do that full blast in the first five minutes. Maybe a toned down version. Sometimes I’ll use a camera as a prop to give her that type of attention. Many girls have a narcissistic side. Again, this is against all PUA theory that says you should never show interest in the girl in a way that puts her on a pedestal. No way – appreciation can be seductive.
Again, these tricks only work if you have the full context going on. Without access to anger and strong boundaries and everything else that makes a man a man, being appreciative will get you friend zoned. If you have all the elements in place, then there is no weakness here – it’s a strength. You are strong enough to openly show interest. It’s no skin off your nose. What’s she going to do about it? Not fuck you? It’s not needy interest, it’s lusty interest. Ya, you feel like you might jump her and rape her, or you might feel a heart centered emotion. Or a full bodied appreciation. But you are contained, still, in the act. You aren’t asking for any permission. It’s not needy. In fact, it’s a gift. This type of gaze is a huge gift.
But I’ll usually take it “slow”. He he, moving a girl in on the first date, but taking it slow.
Ok, here’s an example. My current girl. We met online, and our first date was at a coffee shop. Her English was mostly absent, so we used Google translate on my laptop. We used her phone as a prop for kino, with her showing me pictures on it. We laughed a lot. That’s a key – feeling comfortable, and laughing. I don’t think I can teach that, the comfort probably comes from personal experience. Of course there is a little bit of tension in just meeting someone, but I tend to enjoy their company, and have fun leading the interaction. Just looking at a girls face and seeing her react to my voice and expressions has a kind of pleasant thrill to it. Especially a pretty young face. Better than TV.
Anyway, my apartment was close to the coffee shop, so of course I invited her up to take a look. She chooses the sofa, so I sit close to her, using the mini laptop with google translate as a prop to share touch. Laughter again. Lots of laughing. Then we’re holding hands. By now I’m giving her a little bit of the look. I can’t help it. She’s so young, so beautiful, so hot. What other look can I have? Soon she’s singing along to a song on her phone, using my fingers a prop microphone. “There is something in the way, you look at me”. The same song many girls sing for me.
After a few songs I start to escalate. Grabbing at her titties through her clothes. She grabs my hand and moves it away. Over to the other nipple. So I grab at that breast, and she moves it away again. Over to the other nipple. When she says stop, I smile, and back way up, reclining into the couch, with a look of happy self satisfaction on my face. She waits for more attention, but I’m waiting for her. Not a word. Then she comes towards me, and I escalate again, wrestling to get my hands under her shirt. Sometimes when she says stop, I don’t stop. Sometimes I do, retreat, and wait for her to come in for more. Over and over it’s like this, until it’s her curfew.
But by now she can hardly tear herself away from me. She lingers for another 40 minutes, saying goodbuy. I grab her ass when I hug her and find her jeans are soaking wet.
Now, I can’t say what I did well in that date, but I will tell you that no man had ever even felt under her shirt before. She’s quite hot, and of course always has several suitors lined up, many young and handsome, many rich. One even famous. But with ME things moved fast on the first date.
And from that night on I just assumed she would fall in love with me. And she did. Of course it was no easy task passing her shit tests and keeping her infatuated, but I know how to do that. I have some posts about that period. September of two years ago.
One competitive edge that I have over other suitors is that I escalate kino very fast, and I don’t take no to mean no. No doesn’t really mean that. If she means no, she’ll stand up, or you’ll hear it in her voice. The art of sexual escalation is a massive, massive competitive advantage. Even right from the beginning dominance comes into play.
Another girl who moved in on the first date was screaming at the top of her lungs for the whole boarding house to hear “STOP! NO! STOP!” while I forcefully ripped her pants off of her. She had a shocked look on her face, but was also nervously laughing. You really need highly honed social skills to read these cues, but you should be able to cultivate them. After getting her naked we played around for a while until I started playing “just the tip”. “No really, just the tip”. Of course we were boning shortly thereafter.
Was that rape? Well she never moved out of my place. We were together 2.5 years, and she’s been my stalker ever since.