Reader Olympus Mons rallied to the cause of Dads and Society in his non-native English. His is a war cry heard often throughout the manosphere. Society is going to shit, and it’s the libertine ways of men and women that are to blame. Let’s get back to the good old days of a structured and restricted family based society where we can properly invest in and influence our children. Virgin brides for all! Heartfelt stuff.
a) If you are a “dad” that is how one looks at “cads” (editor: in his previous comment he refers to the cad sexual strategy as being paternally uninvested and therefore primitive to the point of debasing the human condition)– as the other way around “Cads” View “dads” as one pussy beta males. Neither is very elaborate.
Yes, the two sides have very different viewpoints and view each other with disdain or even antagonism.
b) Secondly nor a “Cad” is remotely fulfilled by spending is time around his kids and osmoses as much as possible with its existence
I doubt it’s quite that black and white. However I’ll agree that some guys have relatively little paternal instinct. Relatively.
nor “dads” are one pussy beta males struggling with women attention. Believe me, I would challenge you any time of the day to enter a bar and see who has the greater attention from the other sex.
It seems to be the view in most all manosphere blogs that the dads have lost the social support that their sexual strategy used to rely on, and are thus now at a competitive disadvange in the sexual marketplace as compared to the cads. Society used to strictly enforce lifetime monogamy and virginal marriages, and the dads allied with the matrons to form a community wide policing system. With those days dead, the dads now have to compete head to head with the guys who never needed such a support system to begin with. Many dads are whining and complaining that it’s not fair, and they wish things would return to a more civil time. A time conducive to their sexual strategy. A time when the dads had wide social power. You guys are like an army – together you have power but individually the free agents tend to beat your ass.
c) Anthropologically this is an issue to be solved. The gene expression of “Foragers Cads” and the descendents of “Farmers dads” are meeting again in the arena. That has not happen for very, very long time. Neolithic famers took the world by storm and even overall CADttes chose farmers (one kid almost every year vs a 4 to 4 years forager life style birth rate). In the last 100 years western society has “released” cads out and its consequences are patent: Higher creativity and a buck load of shit in the trail: impoverish monoparental families, higher levels of promiscuity (which creates image problems to females without a Cad group suport) , continuously breaking of norms, etc.
It’s difficult to comment on who women chose to fuck – the farmers or the invading whordes. I think the evidence says both. Women do tend to fuck the invaders, and when abducted quickly get Stockholm syndrome. It’s more an issue of which groups prospered more, and unsurprisingly a co-operative group with a more advanced technology will be expected to be able to support more children.
d) Its becoming a problem in some societies. US is having an endemic problem with kids being born out of a structure family therefore appealing ever more to the mantra “it takes a village to raise a child” (where the fuck is his family?) which annoys Farmer dads tremendously , in Europe social Suport schemas are breaking apart partly due to the pressure of the “village” having to support everyone…. And to make it worse the economic upperhand is moving to the Asia, where this all Cad stuff is more or less alien.
I’ve never entered this discussion, because it seems pointless to me. If so, so what? Am I expected to do something about it? Have outrage, or something? Will that help someone? Am I not doing my bit socially because I refuse to waste my mental thought process cycles on a problem that has no solution?
And you are missing the big picture. The social changes we are talking about are minuscule compared to the technological changes that we are currently experiencing. History has shown us that technology changes what our options as a society are. Farming gave rise to new cultural arrangements. As did the industrial revolution. The social arrangments are embeded in the technological possibilities.
You are talking about making changes through a vast conspiracy of social agreement. “Let’s all promote lifetime monogamy again! Hurray”. But social changes don’t happen that way. They grow out of opportunity. Teenagers quietly learn that they can take the birth control pill, against their parents wishes. Girls move out of their family’s house to go to university in a far away town. Then get a job as a market analyst in a big anonymous city full of big anonymous cock. But the upcoming technological changes that will bring new opportunities for our children will dwarf all of the changes of the last century.
We don’t know what they will be. But it will be dramatic. A game changer. Again.
Biotech will be a part of it, as will bio-computational interfaces.
There are times for group solutions, and there are times for individual solutions.
I argue that this is the time for individual solutions. For adapting to the times as individuals to make the best of it that we can. The old alliance of dads is now powerless. Don’t waste time on it. You’ll just fill your life with impotent frustration.
Dads are naturally co-operative, and band together to form highly organized high trust societies. But your work sometimes leads to beurocratic nightmares. Your natural tendencies to co-operate also need the balance of individuated go-your-own way free thinking.
If you want children, you’ll have to have them without the aid of social supports, and even in an environment antagonistic to your paternal purpose. You’ll need very strong long term relationship game, and an air tight income and asset protection strategy. You may need to learn to think as a free agent, rather than as a good community member. Don’t be a part of a sick system. Have protected anonymous income and a passport. Play by your own rules. Go rogue. When you’re asked for half your assets and stealth alimony/child support, wave bye bye from the window seat of the 747.