It’s a good thing we are trying to do. A bold adventure in human consciousness. Men gathering together on the net explaining to each other all the things that work to get girls to fuck us.
We try to see the patterns. We go out and experiment, we share our war stories, compare insights, and build up theories of the female mind.
But the human mind is not good at holding many variables at once. A few guys, like Warren Buffet, apparently can, but most of us can only consider a few. Mr. Buffet is one of the few financial analysts with a proven track record – the great bulk of the rest can study financial analysis their whole lives and still not be able to hold enough information in mind at the same time to make predictive decisions.
So we have guys who explain that a woman is going to look either for a bad boy to fuck or a provider to dupe. We have guys whose strategy is to be that bad boy pushing the alpha attraction triggers, and avoid all provider triggers. Guys who say that to get a girl interested, you should appear as if you are not really that interested in the girl.
And then there are the denialists who say that looks or money or muscles or musical talent or height or status among men don’t really count – it all boils down confidence.
The discussion is bound to be flawed because of our cognitive errors. There are too many variables to be able to able to accurately simplify into rule based patterns.
Think about teaching how to create a tasty recipe. One guy can explain that chicken is a good staple. Can’t go wrong with chicken. Another is all about beef. Another guy knows the ins and outs of a great lasagna. What’s missing is that chicken goes great with lemon, rosemary and thyme, and occasionally with a mole sauce, but not so well with bananas. Recipes are combinations. You can’t just take any good staple and mix it with any other.
In order for a guy to do more than just don’t-fuck-up-game, to shoot out of his league and get girls who are way hotter than him to fuck and fall in love with him, he must be able to provide a great recipe. Better yet a whole cookbook of recipes. Bananas and chocolate. Cranberries and pork. Marmalade and cottage cheese on a bagel. He has to mix beta provider game in just the right proportions with Alpha game. He has to include the intoxicating romance of red wine along with the the simple sexual basics of brie and a baguette. He must entrance her senses with a wild ride of blueberry cheesecake cunnilingus, but not make a meal of the desert. The courses are spaced out, and the overall balance leaves all the desires fulfilled, one by one. Bread and butter, salad, mushroom soup, Kobe beef, shrimp, snails, rice, vegetables, ice cream. Promises of the dream, intense passionate connection, dangerous public sex, devil may care abandon, comfort, laughter, drama.
Guys usually have a specialty or two. We’re bound to, as our temperaments build us to specialize. One guy will be a master at Chinese take out. Another a pastry chef. Another the burger king. Listening to people talk can be confusing if you mix up instructions on making the best burger with making the best soufle.
So each man is going to have to mix and match and pick out his own fresh ingredients, to offer up something unique tempered to his personality and interests.
The confusing part in this is that what for one guy is a huge fuck up, is to another his greatest strength. One guy who can stand out as high value in a bar is going to be all about getting sluts with attachment avoidance issues to fuck him before he leaves town, and will use an aloof demeanour to achieve his goal. Another guy who is ugly but likes to make girls fall in love with him will play up the Don Juan intensity of connection and instant romance to sell the girl the dream.