Well, to get a bit freaky Machiavellian about it – oppressing is not much fun, really. Control is useless, unless it is nuanced, to seem like flirting.
To oppress someone, and still enjoy it, you have to oppress someone smart enough and free enough to be unpredicatable.
And then, you have to get something from the effort, a challise or prise or joke or smile. Preferably a long orgasm, follwed by a second.