How to engender erotic paternal love
Posted by xsplat on May 12, 2013
Valhalla Wrote: OP so what sorts of things do you do when talking to a woman to do this? (engender paternal love)
Well, the first time I was introduced to this dynamic was in my early thirties with a woman who was 11 years older than me. We were both long time meditators, which may have moved us towards being unintimidated by taboos and open to the moment. Somehow during sex I stumbled onto the role play of calling her daughter and being her Daddy. She responded strongly immediately, with no hesitation. Like putting on a glove for the first time and finding a perfect fit. Boom, she went for that ride and it took her far.
Since then I’ve received at least as positive feedback from scores of women, and the positive feedback has re-enforced my role play into a full blown full time persona. I don’t play Daddy anymore, I am Daddy.
So by now it’s not a matter of doing anything in particular. I sometimes have to bite my lip to NOT say “Daddy loves you, Daddy loves you” in ecstatic moments. But even with new girls I don’t bother to bite my lip. Even for first time sex. Girls respond very well to this. Always. Or, almost always. I remember 1 older woman who the next day acted all put off. I think she mis-read some romantic intentions into the words. The words are not the content of the feeling – the content of the feeling comes out in subtle vocal intonations. The words are just a carrier tone.
And that hints at more of the dynamic. With the voice there is sympatico. Lovers coo together, and through this cooing reach a sympathetic resonance. The Daddy dynamic is all about sympathetic resonance, so the advantage in it comes firstly from raising your own passion, which feeds emotion to the girl to resonate with, which since you have paternal love you will feel attuned to and resonate back with her, and you will get some form of cooing. The cooing could be slapping, choking, spanking, spitting, low grunts, high squeals, romantic words – anything – anything that is feeding emotion back and forth to each other. Since your emotion is heightened due to paternal love, you’ll feed more into that system and get more out of it. She’ll get way higher and way more invested, because how you resonate together.
But at first in order to start to feel that kink of that flavor of connection, you can do explicit role play. You dont have to start right in with Daddy/Daughter. You can explore her being a nurse, a student, a prostitute, a schoolgirl. Play around and get into different roles, and see what mutual effect they have. Once you get around to Daddy/Daughter, play some more. Say things like “Don’t tell your mother.” That one is hilarious. The girl will play along. And you are saying this stuff while you are actually fucking – playing this game. She’ll get right into it, so deeply that in a way it will become real for her. She’ll eventually start to view you as your real, actual father, in some mystic/emotional but still very real way.
Just go with the flow with the role play. It’s fun and gets the two of you engaged more broadly. If you look into her eyes while fucking her and feel at least lust, that lust can expand out into appreciation which can also bleed into types of love.
One trick with these things is to not let the awareness be too narrow. Inhabit many areas of the body at once, as well as have an eyes open generalized awareness, as well as be aware of her, as well as be emotional, and so forth. Don’t just get stuck in your head or the tip of your dick. Sometimes it can take a while before the loving feeling will rise up to the heart – maybe 15 minutes or more into the fucking session, but after it does then it’s much easier to fuck without coming, as you will feel both more sensation while at the same time more control. You’ll feel embodied, in power, and in control. Her face might begin to glow and you’ll be having a flow moment. The two of you can be very emotionally open then, and do whatever the hell you want. I often like dominance submissive games, but I don’t only go there. I go into many different emotional places. Sometimes just a good basic long grunting session.
lush1 Wrote: I think you might be making quite an interesting point but I’m not sure how exactly you would go about eliciting these responses, apart from role play in the bedroom.
Can you give specific examples of words/actions you would use when gaming a girl to help develop the father/daughter thing?
There can be a web of responses related to the daddy/daughter dynamic, and the related dynamics work in concert. Authority figures demand both respect and obedience, so if you routinely give orders to your girl, she’ll start to view you as her authority figure. If she at the same time call you by the pet name Daddy, then you’ve built up an even stronger circuit than what she might have with her boss at work – now her actions are devotionals.
The daddy/daughter dynamic can be an entire system. A cohesive system. You get a feel for it as you go along. The desired end result is a bonded servant who is head over heels in love with you and will do whatever you want on command. But to do this well it helps to get so into your role that you embody it. If you are going to put in so much work as to have a sex slave, it makes sense to actually be into the girl. And so investing some real emotion into the situation is part of the cost of the real emotional benefits that you get out of it. Actually being into the girl is important. And that might be tough for guys who have already lost the ability to bond. For them they might need to work to repair their bonding systems first before trying to play Daddy and elicit a daughter response.
Can a guy, especially a younger guy, fake it until he makes it with the Daddy persona? I don’t know – I guess it depends on if he can find incremental steps that give him positive feedback along the way.
I don’t want to get lost in describing the whole web of what can make up a daddy/daughter dynamic and how to elicit all the responses. I just wanted to start a thread touching in on the part where we hack our own systems, such that we craft emotions inside ourselves that are useful for personal satisfaction as well as for manipulating the women in our lives. Feeling paternal love – really feeling it and not faking it – is useful. That is an important step on the path to getting the girl to feel love for you as her Daddy.